i dont have any answers

i don't have answers to life's unending questions. it seems like each day it gets harder and harder. the drama never ends, the emotions run high, fast and raw, the exhaustion is intensified, and the "nothing" is swallowing me whole. the newest thing is that kennedy's mom moved to sacramento, and we still have her, which i am pretty sure is permanent, which i didn't think was so awful, tiring but not awful. until...my husband tells me he doesn't think our marriage will survive this added stress. i am stressed about doing the right thing and having my husband and kids suffer. my mother-in-law is freaked out, and that makes it hard, she vents to my father-in-law that she doesn't want to go out of town and now he is super pissed at me, the finances are awful, and it doesn't have to be this way. there are so many programs and such that kennedy's mom could have signed up for that would at least give us a little. and believe me, it is so not about money! but it would take a little stress off of us. two science projects due monday, a costume to find, and the normal stuff i tend to each day. yet, i find myself near tears or crying about every five minutes, i find myself ready to bolt out the door, and i find myself fearing life. i want this drama to end, to just go one 24 hour period without drama, would be utterly fantastic. i have so much sadness inside, from my past, stuff that hurts to even remember. i feel alone, and it feels really big this time around. i don't have answers. not this time.