it's december already!!!!

it's december already!!!!!!!!! the time seems to fly by. i get up in the morning, do my thing, and go to bed in the late hours of the night, only to be awoken by my alarm to start all over again. it is amazing to me, how many things i can cram into one day. lately, i have been totally overwhelmed and feel like i am glad the days are going by so quickly. i feel a total hollowness in my life right now, and please don't start preaching that i need to fill it with jesus, because i am fine in that arena right now. it is a great pat answer, but that is not what i am needing at this point. i feel his love, and am confident in that, my problem is that i i am feeling no love or acceptance anywhere else. i am so tired of feeling like i have to scream to get anyone to talk to me or to even notice i am in the room. i wish so much that it wasn't this way. i enjoy my alone time, what little of it i get, it seems to be my stability at this time. i savor the quietness and the amount of stuff i can accomplish without a bunch or people around. i hope that soon will be bringing more joy to me. even christmas seems hard this year, and it usually brings me so much joy, and hope. the one thing that i have to look ahead to, is disneyland. the thought of that keeps me going some days. i hope tomorrow is brighter than today................